If you have ever wondered how one can feel calm, relaxed and empowered after blowing a cool $100 mill on the basis trade that the Merrill salesguy was pitching incessantly as totally risk-free, after ingesting an elephant dose of estrogen in an office with the climatic characteristics of Vladivostok, then wonder no more, for a wealth of information, outsider and vice versa, and a comfy leather coach are about to be fully accessible to you. Ari Kiev, M.D., the inhouse "psychiatrist to the hedge fund stars"
has launched a new consulting firm, Kiev Consulting, which will specialize in "peak performance coaching for hedge funds and institutional investors and traders."
After having spent nearly a decade working with none other than
Blue Eyes himself, it strikes us as odd that the two have opted for this "amicable" split: after all where will Stevie's legions of permaprofitable PMs get their peak performance coaching and such words of wisdom like "To cope with a shrinking portfolio, we suggest that you set spending priorities, tune out the noise and keep your cool." (for many more pearls of PM pep talk we suggest perusing Dr. Kiev's own
blog.)
Either way, Stevie's loss is our gain (and Ari's windfall), as portfolio managers are desperate now more than ever for an attentive ear (as their golddigger wives have long since left them with only a divorce lawyer invoice and a huge Centurion bill) to which they can whisper all the details of their counterparty risk having gone up 10 times or triggering every stop loss as Volkswagen hit €1000. In Ari's own words "this consulting practice effectively allows me to broaden my reach and offer customized services to an increasing number of fund managers who are recognizing the importance of a psychological perspective in managing investments. Given the stress of today's market and the challenges faced by professional investors, I felt the time was ripe for expanding my consultation work."
Kiev has said his counsel will encompass dealing with the stress of drawdowns, the behavioral dimension of risk management, psychological screening of analysts and portfolio managers, and creative approaches to building cultures of collaboration, this time presumably not based on unknowingly sipping clinical doses of progesterone with your morning coffee.
Some more phenomenal
insight from the doctor himself on what makes the perfect specimen of uber-profitable manager: "I think the best guys are really very skillful in avoiding drawdown; the best guys are good at getting out of losers; the best guys are good at pressing the bet when they see the opportunity. They are making the most of their money; they have the eye of the tiger; they have great purpose, great intensity and a willingness to really stick it out..."
With this kind of insight we are confident the good doctor will be earning more than his former boss in no time.
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If you have ever wondered how one can feel calm, relaxed and empowered after blowing a cool $100 mill on the basis trade that the Merrill salesguy was pitching incessantly as totally risk-free, after ingesting an elephant dose of estrogen in an office with the climatic characteristics of Vladivostok, then wonder no more, for a wealth of information, outsider and vice versa, and a comfy leather coach are about to be fully accessible to you. Ari Kiev, M.D., the inhouse "psychiatrist to the hedge fund stars" has launched a new consulting firm, Kiev Consulting, which will specialize in "peak performance coaching for hedge funds and institutional investors and traders."
We have written extensively on the subject (here and here), and we feel it is about time mainstream media paid a little more attention to this very troubling issue. In a time of unprecedented losses for most investors, it is counterintuitive that lawyers should be getting paid as much as $1,110/hour, as this new Bloomberg report observes.
In his annual letter to investors, Ray Dalio, whose $80 billion Bridgewater fund is doing phenomenally well, returning almost 9% in 2008, had some advice and warnings to investors. Key among them: to be truly objective when designing a portfolio of investments and to remove any market bias, as strategy optimization without a deep enough understanding of "how it would work in all circumstances, including circumstances that did not occur within the period that's your frame of reference, you will inevitably do badly." In other words, if you don't anticipate everything that could happen when you throw money in the market, you are bound to lose.
Charlie Gasparino just broke the news that most recent ponzmaster Nick Cosmo of the $370 million Agape World ponzi, had extensive mob connections. Turns out Nick had a gambling addiction problem and owed a lot of money to loan sharks working for the Genovese mafia, and allegedly the Gambino family paid off around $139,000 of these debts on Cosmo's behalf. Also, former mob member Mike D'Urso, currently an informant for the government and in the witness protection program, apparently had tried to collect (or "shook") the money from Cosmo on behalf of the Genovese.
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This bloomberg article has left us a little speechless... First of all, as we point out recently, Wells Fargo has recently been hiking the rates on its 30 year (and other) conforming mortgages. Today, the bank has stated publicly that the slow drop in rates is due to "soaring" demand for mortgages... Seems nothing can stop people from inflating the next bubble as we are still in the old bubble. Curious how many of the people who are among the soaring crowds lining up in front of Wells' mortgage offices already have 2, 3 or more mortgages that are underwater or in foreclosure... No doubt Wells is really very careful this time around when approving new mortgages. Secondly, how can it be difficult to be lowering rates, i.e. be competitive with everyone else who is sub 5% on the 30 year conforming, when you are seeing this "soaring" demand. In a word, we are a little skeptical of this most recent version of media spin
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Looking at the industry participants on the left, it is ironic that Dassault, which was Vikram's pick for a security-gate skipping vehicle in the form of the Falcon 7x, has only a 1% market share. What is concerning is that the bulk of the companies that make private aircraft are U.S.-based. As one can kiss all private jet backlog good bye for at least several years, many of these companies will simply not survive, and while we do not have the number of people employed at each handy, it would seem that a lot of innocent people will end up on the unemployment line for mistakes committed by others. Very sad state of affairs.
Citigroup spokesman Stephen Cohen has confirmed in an interview today that Citigroup "has no intent to take delivery of any new aircraft," and promptly declined to comment beyond the statement. The great arbitrator Obama, who was among the first to weigh in on commode-gate, has said he "doesn't believe using private jets is the best use of money."
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